Sometimes Only Faith Remains

Life some time takes you through experiences where you need to make tough decisions which are imposed by incidences. Decisions are not always as easy as choosing a color you want to wear for a party, sometimes it takes a lot of courage to make a decision.

I am sharing my real-life incident which took place a couple of months ago.

I was planning new year with my family for a small vacation, leaving on 29^th-December and coming back on 2^nd-January. We have been planning for this breakthrough since so long, but life never goes as you plan it.

On 27^th of December, my father said he is not feeling well and has mild fever. After paying a visit to the local doctor who handed him a couple of medicines for fever, we were really hoping that he will soon be better, and we would be able to stick to our original planned vacation as all bookings have been already done.

But next day his condition worsened he was not able to swallow anything, not able to sit on his own, not able to walk, just nothing. We got horrified and called our family doctor home, he gave another set of medicines and asked to wait till tomorrow for condition to improve. As day passed his health started deteriorating and we could not watch him suffer like this, so we thought of admitting him to a nearby hospital for proper medication and care.

They did a couple of tests in the evening and next morning, they told us that they cannot treat him any further as his kidneys have stopped responding. We were asked to transfer him to a multi-specialty hospital with better facilities.

I am 27 years in age and have never handled a medical emergency ever before in my life. Whenever we had any problem, we used to look up to him and he used to take care of everything. I suddenly felt responsible to take decision to save his life.

We got him admitted to a multi-specialty hospital and he was immediately transferred to ICU, his treatment started and after almost an hour a form arrived which says if anything happens to him, hospital will not be held responsible. When I picked up a pen to sign it, my hands started shivering, I was unable to move my fingers as if some one has asked me my life. I had no choice but to sign it.

I was still trying to gather myself, and again I was being called by the doctor who suggested to have immediate dialysis as infection has started impacting other organs. A wave of shock ran through me and I never felt this much helpless before, life has given so many bouncers in last 24 hours that my mind has lost the ability to think through things to make right decisions. I just had a minimum idea that dialysis is being done for people who have dis functional kidneys. So i just agreed with doctor and gave him the permission for the same to be started after two hours as I have lost my ability to judge anything at that moment.

I was just hoping & begging God to please make everything back to normal, faith was the only option that I was left with. I started receiving phone calls from relatives, and when they came to know about dialysis, they began their series of vague suggestions that it is not a good idea; reports are not that bad. And all of a sudden everybody was blaming me, that I am making a wrong decision because once a dialysis begins for a person it will continue throughout the life.

I felt myself struggling to make a decision & suddenly the burden of questions seems to overpower me,  what should i do: on one side i have a doctor who is saying it is urgently required and on other side, I have a family saying don’t go for it. Between all this chaos, time has arrived to take him for dialysis and i still could not make my mind. I was dumbstruck, i kept thinking if the situation was vice versa he would have been so sure, and I cannot take just a single decision.

I got a call from ICU shall we proceed for dialysis? I was not confident; I will never be able to forgive myself if anything goes wrong. Finally, i just said yes and leaving everything on faith.

First Dialysis was completed, and we were hoping reports will improve but there was minimal improvement. In next week itself, he had undergone three more dialysis and results were not that much satisfactory. Words of my relatives started haunting me and his body was continuously getting weak every passing day.

All I had was a hope that he will get better, and one day, when doctors completed 5th dialysis and did routine tests, to everyone’s surprise, his body responded positively. Doctors now were talking about discharging him if they see improvements in next 1 week. It has been almost a month since he has been hospitalized with 21 days in ICU. Eventually, the day also come for which we have been waiting for so long now, we can take him back home.

After almost 2 months, by God’s grace, he is doing fine with regular medications, a proper diet and regular test to check his kidney status.

Trust me decision making does not always comes easy and we should just keep thanking our parents for never let the burden of decision-making fall on our shoulders...!!

Sometimes all we have is Faith to count upon & it does bless you happily… 😊😊